The Very Mad Santa

It was the month before the Holidays and Santa was working on his List in Office365. Checking whose naughty or nice. When all of a sudden, up pops an alert with a longer than normal blurb. 

It read, “Your Office free trial is up.  You currently owe Microsoft for the one billion Office licenses that you handed out as gifts last year.”  

“Click OK or Cancel”

Santa pressed Cancel

Another popup box appeared:  “Pay the fee?” 

“Click Okay or Cancel”

Santa’s rosy cheeks went smooth as his smile turned upside down.

Santa pressed “Cancel”

Clippy appeared, pointing his paperclip rear end at the text:  “Erase everything?” with two button options: “Okay or Cancel”.

Santa’s face turned a darker shade of red and his bushy grey eyebrows crowded together above his dark angry eyes.

At that same moment, Santa’s office door burst open.   In the shadow of the lights, stood a taller than average elf with an envelope. 

An envelope with a red, yellow, green and blue letter “G” on it.  

Santa stopped and looked as the elf opened the envelope, pulled out a letter and handed it to the perplexed large man.

Santa’s bifocals appeared as if by magic and he was able to read the message.

Dear Santa.

 It looks like you’re in a pickle.   If you can spare two minutes, I’ll wiggle you out in a jiggle.

We have a new toy, it’s shiny and cheap.

It’s what all the kids want, but they won’t say a peep

We think that the parents would like it since it’s silent and won’t even bing

The kids will love it since it’s quiet when their messages ping

It’s good for Sally or Zoya or Kai-Mong 

When you give kids Chromebooks, you can’t do no wrong

There won’t be a license fee.

Kids could learn for free

We can transfer your list or better yet,

Make a new one for you, you won’t have to fret

We’ll read all your emails and find just the right gifts

You won’t have to do anything, we can make the list



It was spelt, just like the block toy letters that Santa handed out.

Santa looked back at Clippy.  His eyes about to melt

“Thank you Clippy for your offer but I have to roll the dice

I’ll take my chances with Alphabet because I can’t pay your price”

Santa reached over and his gloved paw moved the mouse.

His face went back to normal and his eyes sparkled and shone.

“Okay” was pressed and Clippys eyes bulged as his body zoomed off. 

The larger than average elf smiled, his fingers still crossed.

The moral of the story is that decent privacy has a price.

You can either pay for privacy or pay with privacy.

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